Nǐ hǎo!!

Welcome to another weekly Movie and TV Review!

This week we’re looking at the animated film Nezha, a family-friendly comedy apparently based on the book Investiture of the Gods. I’ll be honest, this is the first time I’ve heard of it, as I’m not really into Chinese culture like that. But after this, I’ll definitely look into it. I might even watch the live-action drama by the same name.

But anypoops, it’s a well-needed change from the past few depressing movies that have been living rent-free in my head. A heavy film, Nezha follows a family of three—or technically five, but the two elder sons are MIA. Lol.

I digress.

Disgruntled disciple and catman Shen Gongbao intentionally gives newborn Nezha the demon Chaos Pearl after being overlooked by Supreme Lord Yuanshi Tianzun in favor of his slovenly counterpart, Taiyi Zhenren. Our great Lord Yuanshi Tianzun, in his infinite wisdom, also curses said Chaos Pearl to be destroyed in three years, so the bearer—or incarnate—of the pearl is basically a goner.

If I had to give an elevator pitch, it would be a mix of Jesus, Hercules, Harry Potter, and Naruto thrown together with a few plot holes.

Now let’s get it!!!!!!

Set in the magical land of prehistoric China—or a China-like land called Chentang Pass—we meet Lord Li Jing and his very pregnant bride, Lady Yin, on the verge of welcoming their third son, Nezha.

After three years of pregnancy, Lady Yin is finally about to give birth and fulfill heaven’s prophecy. But Shen Gongbao switches the Spirit Pearl for the Chaos Pearl and dives 20,000 leagues under the sea.

One Day in Heaven Is One Year on Earth

The power harnessed within the Chaos Pearl speeds up Nezha’s growth and grants him genius-level intelligence and brute strength.

Technically, Nezha is only three years old, but when released from his chains, similar to pearl-brother Ao Bing, his true form resembles a boy around the age of sixteen.

In a flashback, the movie shows him as a baby interacting with the townsfolk. I assume that was during the period when his father was away in the heavens searching for a way to cancel the curse.

So how exactly are we measuring his growth?

Was his bound child form his true form had he been a normal kid?

I’m confused!! Lol.

The Ao Bing Question

I wondered what Nezha’s character would have been like had he received the Spirit Pearl at birth, but then I thought he probably would’ve been as basic as Ao Bing.

My question then became: why wasn’t Ao Bing as spicy as Draco Malfoy?

Lucius Malfoy drilled hatred into Draco like nobody’s business, so if Ao Bing’s father, the Dragon King, hated Supreme Lord Yuanshi Tianzun and hated his situation so much, why wasn’t Ao Bing affected?

Why wasn’t he calling Nezha an earth-bound mudblood?

(Pun intended.)

Not to mention his Sifu is the very ninja who got him and Nezha into this predicament.

Peter Pettigrew—I mean Shen Gongbao.

Was it the purity of the Spirit Pearl that left him untouched by their influence?

Final Thoughts

Despite the many problems, Nezha was a good movie.

It was comedic and, dare I say, heartwarming.

I’m becoming soft. Lol.

It had the classic Naruto “never give up” message that never fails to charge me up for the next battle life throws my way.

Overall, I enjoyed it.

Anypoops, I give Nezha 3 out of 5 rose petals.

P.S. I’m sorry, guys. There’s no excuse for the late posting, and hopefully this won’t happen again. I will do better and work my movie time around my work schedule.

I should work hard for others but not for myself?

Absolutely not!!

Fight!!!